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These horror stories remind me of my own.
1st marriage: she had 3 daughters. The older two were great, particularly the middle girl. The younger one was, and still is, nothing but trouble.
She lied, stole things, broke stuff, and did some of the NASTIEST things I've ever seen. She alone was cause for divorce. The mother was worthless, refused to do anything and was often in her nightclothes for days at a time.
We divorced and the two older girls wanted to stay with me as their father would not take them and their mother became a drunk.
I finnished raising the girls and they are on their own and doing fine. Finnished school and have kids. To their consideration, I am their father and those kids are my grandchildren.
Divorced because their mother started sleeping with her drinking buddies.
2nd marriage: Again, 3 kids. older boy, younger sisters. The boy was like the younger girl from 1st marriage-- trouble, but on a much larger scale. At 10 years old, he would cuss at me and throw things, beat his sisters with anything he could find. When he told me he would burn my house down, I put him out. When his mom objected, I put her out. The youngest girl would crap in her pants at 7 years old and say " I didn't know I had to go". Really, how can you not know something was falling out of your butt? Anyway, dear old mom was meeting people on the internet while I was working and I came to find she was a slut in every sense of the word. That put her out pernamently and for all time.
So, I had time to reflect on my misstakes and move on. I am a member of a few forums, mostly motorcycle related stuff. That, or reps. I didn't bother to find anyone, no looking at all. I figured I had been married for the past 20 years, time for me. In this time, I had some interesting encounters, made some friends and had a life. I also decided I know what I am and what I am about and no woman was gonna change me to fit her needs and wants. If someone wanted me, then she has to deal with me as I am. There is no warranty. I've had heart attacks and other major health issues. If I didn't end up with another woman, then, fine. I am a broke down old mule, I came to terms that all those younger gals weren't worth having { and they don't want older guys, either} and the older gals want younger guys, richer guys, or at least someone in good health. I don't fit any of that.
So, life goes and things happen and life goes more. I made lots of friends in the cyber world. People I know I can trust and count one. One lady in particular helped me through some very trying times in my life. We emailed and phoned each other and this became a daily thing, just discussing life stuff. She was divorced and got along with the ex ok, but his drinking caused their divorce.
Anywho......... one day she calls and asks if I want to meet up. I said sure. She says meet me in Toronto. I fly up there and then we were flying to each other quite often.
We got married in March this year and, while I am waiting for my papers to live in Canada, she comes here once a month to visit for weekends.
She is Tiawanese, and is the sweetest thing ever. Very dedicated and devoted. I am certain this is the lady I should have met when I was learning to fly on my own.
My main lesson learned: be yourself and let someone accept you for that. Don't settle.
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