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05-14-2011, 10:10 AM

I think *make* is the wrong choice of words....

I firmly believe that two people in a relationship/marriage or whatever, have to BOTH work at the relationship to keep it healthy & growing... You can't just expect everything to magically happen just because you are together ...

If you plant seeds & don't water it, it won't grow... You can't assume it will just take care of itself.....

I see too many people get lazy and/or over confident with a false sense of security, just because they are in a relationship, thinking that they now can *relax* and not do anything...

This is where the problem of too many women and/or men let themselves go & expect their partners to just be ok with that because they are already IN the relationship...

You have to constantly nurture your relationship...... ideally it should be equal 50/50... but realistically, it's sometimes 20/80, 40/60, 10/90, 70/30..... That is normal and should change along the way....

Sometimes you just don't feel up to putting in effort on some days... But not making your relationship a priority will be it's downfall one day, that could be visible or not to you...

Don't change who you are for someone else... Be you, but be the best you that you can be.... And do what it is that makes YOU happy... not someone else, because that will only backfire on you later on ...AND never think you can *fix* or *change* anyone else...NOT gonna happen... Never pretend to be anyone other than yourself... be proud of who you are : )

People don't think twice about putting efforts into their business relationships & making those *work*... we all know if we start talking or acting crappy to our bosses or customers, it will have negative results...and these are people we usually do not care about, much less love, SO why would we not want to put that much effort or more into someone we actually do love & care for??

A relationship is one of the best investments you can invest in... that goes for other types as well, not just romantic ones...

AND let me clear up, before someone twists anything... I am not saying or implying anyone needs to be perfect or superficial, etc....
People change , age, etc, etc.... all normal..... BUT you do need to keep your efforts up in your romantic relationships after the marriage or whatever...not just during the *courting* period.

AS for the girl~ who knows..take it one day at a time & you will eventually be sure of what you want & who you want.

That's just my personal opinion for what it's worth.... Good luck : )

05-14-2011, 10:10 AM	#6
spoonersgirl	I think make is the wrong choice of words.... I firmly believe that two people in a relationship/marriage or whatever, have to BOTH work at the relationship to keep it healthy & growing... You can't just expect everything to magically happen just because you are together ... If you plant seeds & don't water it, it won't grow... You can't assume it will just take care of itself..... I see too many people get lazy and/or over confident with a false sense of security, just because they are in a relationship, thinking that they now can relax and not do anything... This is where the problem of too many women and/or men let themselves go & expect their partners to just be ok with that because they are already IN the relationship... You have to constantly nurture your relationship...... ideally it should be equal 50/50... but realistically, it's sometimes 20/80, 40/60, 10/90, 70/30..... That is normal and should change along the way.... Sometimes you just don't feel up to putting in effort on some days... But not making your relationship a priority will be it's downfall one day, that could be visible or not to you... Don't change who you are for someone else... Be you, but be the best you that you can be.... And do what it is that makes YOU happy... not someone else, because that will only backfire on you later on ...AND never think you can fix or change anyone else...NOT gonna happen... Never pretend to be anyone other than yourself... be proud of who you are : ) People don't think twice about putting efforts into their business relationships & making those work... we all know if we start talking or acting crappy to our bosses or customers, it will have negative results...and these are people we usually do not care about, much less love, SO why would we not want to put that much effort or more into someone we actually do love & care for?? A relationship is one of the best investments you can invest in... that goes for other types as well, not just romantic ones... AND let me clear up, before someone twists anything... I am not saying or implying anyone needs to be perfect or superficial, etc.... People change , age, etc, etc.... all normal..... BUT you do need to keep your efforts up in your romantic relationships after the marriage or whatever...not just during the courting period. AS for the girl~ who knows..take it one day at a time & you will eventually be sure of what you want & who you want. That's just my personal opinion for what it's worth.... Good luck : )