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Lonely Hearts Club Forum Looking for someone with a common interest? Why not go where they hang out? Have fun, but not TOO much fun in here. ONLY members over 18 are welcome here.

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Old 07-26-2013, 05:30 PM   #1
shelliebear
Dating an older man?

Well, my first marriage lasted 9 months. Endless issues happened...he spent too much money on stupid car parts we didn't need (a $150 cold air intake? Really? on a '93 explorer?) and left me all the time for his friends.
So I ended up cheating...not right, I know. But anyway, I'm now with that guy, and he's quite a bit older than me. He's 51 and I'm 20.
What do you think about dating older guys? A lot of people have been telling me it's disgusting, but I couldn't disagree more. I've fantasized about older men since I was 10. In fact my mother used to catch me on the internet talking to 40 and 50 year olds when I was that age, and she'd get angry and set up internet passwords that I bypassed over time.
I find older men...much older, even, to be very attractive. I like that they are more "settled"--usually they have a house, a college degree, a job, they know where they want to go. I even like that my guy has family--I'm not sure if I want a family yet, so being around his lets me get to know what it's like. It's nice to have someone who wants to spend time with me, to get to know me, not just be selfish and focus on their needs.
And without going too in depth, there is always that sex factor, with experience. He knows things I had no idea of and it makes it much nicer.
What are your thoughts? Have you dated someone older? What did you think?
I'm just curious to hear other's ideas. It's not going to change my opinion but I'd love to hear yours.
 
Old 07-26-2013, 05:33 PM   #2
shelliebear
Not to mention he's experienced a lot of life. He taught me to play cribbage and we've watched old movies I hadn't seen together--Casablanca, Rocky, Roman Holiday, Star Trek, etc.
And I don't just find them attractive on the inside. I think they look quite nice on the outside too.
 
Old 07-26-2013, 06:07 PM   #3
Mistyck
I will only date gentlemen older than me (I'm going to be 30 this Dec). (My ex fiance cured me of EVER wanting to date a guy in my age range again.) My current SO is 16 years older than me, and I've dated a couple gentlemen that were 20+ years older than me...

My mom married my dad when she was 23, and he was 51. So you could say that I've been brought up to not really think about age.

Hell I've been attracted to older men ever since I went through puberty. I have had an ongoing LOVE attraction for Sam Elliott since I was about 13. He was, and always has been SEXY as hell to me!

You were young when you got married...Ugh I remember being your age, and thinking about getting married (ex fiance)...So glad I didn't do it. Here's something that pretty much sums up the way I feel about marriage:
Attached Images
 
 
Old 07-26-2013, 07:39 PM   #4
shelliebear
I was young indeed. Next time I won't make that mistake. I like that picture, haha.
I like how older men look, especially gray hair. Oh my, nothing is quite as sexy as gray hair.
Dunno, I just find older really hot. And he takes his time.
 
Old 07-26-2013, 08:01 PM   #5
Helenthereef
Just so you know, it works the other way round too... my partner being 13 years younger

Maybe we could develop a rotational system, 20 year old girls with 40 year old men, then when you get to be a 40 year old woman you get a 20 year old boy toy...
 
Old 07-26-2013, 08:01 PM   #6
Metachrosis
there went all the young'uns with their dented pride
 
Old 07-26-2013, 08:09 PM   #7
Mistyck
Quote:
Originally Posted by Helenthereef View Post
Maybe we could develop a rotational system, 20 year old girls with 40 year old men, then when you get to be a 40 year old woman you get a 20 year old boy toy...
I never thought of that!
 
Old 07-26-2013, 08:10 PM   #8
Randy F
As long as it makes you happy then don't worry about what other people think. I always got crap because I dated so much younger than I am. Sometimes you just need to do what is right for you. You will see if it is right for you, if you want your own family, or if you want someone you own age. I completely agree with the older guy is more settled, but if you don't have some excitement you will get bored. Find one or two friends you can talk to to get advice and take it day by day.
 
Old 07-26-2013, 08:25 PM   #9
Helenthereef
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mistyck View Post
I never thought of that!
Additional benefit; the 40 year old man will already have been trained by an older woman.....
 
Old 07-26-2013, 08:28 PM   #10
JColt
When I was 17 I had a 39 yr old girlfriend for almost 2 years. I don't think I could do more than 20 years younger than me now. Once the sexual part starts to wind down there has to be some type of connection I can relate to for a day after day relationship. However if it works for you it is good!
 

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