Ad writing 101.

I ran into this ad yesterday and as a buyer I have positive as well as negative vibes (with regards to some of the disclaimers). How does everyone feel about it? This is not a bad or good guy thread, it is just meant to be an open discussion on how to attract and/or discourage potential customers.

My guarantee is as follows: 1) Live arrival; provided there is someone available to sign for the package. All DOAs must be reported to me within 2 hrs of receipt of shipment. You must send the animal back to me or send a pic for verification. 2) Satisfaction guarantee, I do offer a 2 day period for buyer's remorse. What this means is; if the animal(s) you receive aren't what I described them as and/or are not the exact same animal(s) pictured, I will issue a full refund. This is also offered to give the animal a chance to settle in so, that you can see it's full potential. 3) Health, I guarantee all my animals to be feeding consistently and leaving solid stools from the time they leave my facility. All of my offspring will be free of mites, respiratory infections, IBD and overall, will be appear outwardly healthy. I will never knowingly sell a sick animal. There is a limitation to the guarantee of 7 days, in addition to the 2 days given for the satisfaction guarantee for a total of 9 days. 4) Butthole clause; I may refuse service to you if you are an ass. To put it in PC terms... I reserve the right to refuse to sell/service anyone I deem acting inappropriately, maliciously and/or with cruel intentions.
*I cannot and will not guarantee temperament.* Different animals may act differently to different people in different situations. Can I say that? Oh well, I hope I get my point across.
(There are more terms but, I would hope them to be common sense. If you have questions feel free to e-mail me.)
I will make few exceptions to these guarantees. I have worked very hard maintaining my stock over the years to provide the very best. They were selected with very harsh discrimination from the best and yes, even the not-so-very best breeders in the country. As with any animal, I recommend a period of quarantine of at least 30 days. Much of my stock originates from a WC or unknown background that has been thoroughly treated and strictly quarantined for periods of 6 mos and longer. As such, I have the utmost confidence in my animals and myself to produce top quality offspring and nothing less.

Kindly.

LOL I love the butthole clause. I wish I could use it more in life.

Wish I had more time to give my oppinion, running late, fill ya in more later.

Selling at any level requires building a relationship with the buyer. Internet sales only magnify this 100 fold. The wording of that ad while not directly objectionable does not build that relationship. Quite the contrary it leads you to feel that this seller can be a pain to deal with at times.

There are ways to say what was said (for example: "We reservee the right to refuse service" states the same concept without being confrontational) that would make a buyer feel more comfortable about the purchase. And unless you are selling very high end morphs/rare species there are usually many ads out there selling very similiar animals at pretty much the same price, meaning the only difference is the gut feeling the buyer has after reading your ad.

I second that...

The wording was decent throughout most of it- I wouldn't personally put it directly on an Ad, but would link to a web page with terms and conditions of sale, but it was a fairly reasonable guarantee... Right up until the "Butthole Clause"

I think there's at least one "Butthole" in every transaction this guy makes... And I don't think it's the customer.

What the above means of course... Is that while it's not outright offensive, it certainly doesn't give any impression of professionalism, it doesn't supply me with faith that this person is competent, level headed or very bright (since the wording causes the first two doubts) and leaves questions about what kind of service is to be expected *if* there were any problems with a shipment.

I like it.

Only because if me and him were to do a transaction.....he would not hide behind PC.

He would say things as they are.

Lets say I bought an animal from him that he never fed
I bet he would tell me he never fed it.

Some people would tell me it never refused a meal

Perception is reality.

I don't know who this ad was pulled from, so just looking at his ad minus any reputation he may have either way. So in reading the ad the first thing that hit me was that any time he could claim the Butthole clause and I would be out of any customer service. If I'm a newbie, does asking too many newbie questions rate me in that category. If I am the type of person not into confrontration how comfortable will this make me feel, knowing this guy may have an "attitude" I will have to confront if there is a problem.

So how I perceive the attitude in his terms has everything to do with how comfortable I feel as a buyer, and this will be different for each reader of the ad.

Why take the risk of alienating a potential customer before he has made a single request. It is easy enough to pre-qualify the customer after initial contact has been made. Unless of course you are completely flooded with customers and have very limited need of all the requests for information.

I see where he's coming from, and personally I don't have a problem with it.
I can see where it may turn some people off, but I have to agree with Ritchie. It tells me he's "no nonsense" so to speak.

As a matter of fact I have purchased snakes from him, those terms belong to Ray Martin of Razor Reptiles. He was completely professional and a pleasure to deal with. The snakes I bought were sight unseen if I recall correctly and were very well represented.
In reference to Seamus' statement about a potential problem with a shipment, there was a problem with my order from him. Airborne misrouted it and it was delayed a couple of days.
The evening after it was supposed to arrive I had already received a refund for shipping charges, before the snakes had even got here.

I guess I relate to the intent behind the comment. While I probably wouldn't word it that way myself, I do understand why he included it. I've told a few people to keep their money before myself, and simply didn't respond to a few emails. Sometimes it's just not worth the aggravation to deal with some people just to sell a snake. If his including that clause in his terms keeps a few of the "asses" from bothering to order from him, then that's good. It will undoubtedly keep a few of the more sensitive but fine folks from looking to buy from him as well, but that's his choice to make.
I for one would have no problem buying from him again.

I guess I'm with Daniel's opinions in this one. As I said before there are things I like but as Daniel very well put it he is not "building" the relationship with the buyer. He is actual scaring some away.

Regards,

Daniel

Disclaimer: The example is fictitious. Any resemblance with actual events or people is merely coincidental


When selling a [u]very expensive[u] snake like for example a new ball python morph for $40,000, it would be advisable to include shipping in the price. For that kind of money one could even consider hand deliver it personally! It's like selling a Mercedes for $80,000 and stating "by the way ad $30 if you want to have the tank full".

Kindly

I just don't like the way he comes across with his conditions. Would it be acceptable for me to say that at any time during our deal (me being the buyer) If I felt he was being a butthead I could just say to heck with it all. Every seller has the right to do that up to a point. This guy seems to be telling me that it wouldn't take much to push him past that point so I had better be on my absolute best behavior. Its telling me that this guy may be more trouble that what its worth.

Steve Schindler