Anyone else see the humor in this ad? - FaunaClassifieds
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SOUND OFF!!! Ever have something REALLY bugging you and nowhere to vent about it? Well, this is the place. It does not have to be fauna oriented at all! Get it off your chest right here.

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Old 04-15-2005, 03:08 AM   #1
Intense Herpetoculture
Anyone else see the humor in this ad?

Here is the ad, do you see what I see?

EASY FOR YOUR REPTILE TO ASSIMILATE FOR 100% ABSORBABILITY! the one and only: ABSOLUTE CALCIUM!

Do you want colorful healthy animals like this?

ABSOLUTE CALCIUM

A whole food calcium supplement formulated specifically for reptiles.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Unlike other calcium supplements ABSOLUTE Calcium is easy for reptiles to assimilate. Since it is made from naturally occurring ingredients, the body recognizes and is able to use the calcium to benefit itself.

This means that your pet actually gets the calcium into their system instead of simply passing it through like calcium carbonate!

Have you ever seen your reptile eat rocks?

Of course not; so don't give your reptile calcium carbonate or other forms that they just can't use!

Testimonials for ABSOLUTE Calcium

I am a breeder of bearded dragons and have found that nothing works like absolute calcium! One container lasts months and you will notice the difference in your animals appetites immediately. To produce high quality animals like the ones on this website you need two things: 1) animals with colorful genes (from colorful parents), and 2) proper diet and nutritional supplementation. Nothing works like all natural absolute calcium. My hatchlings grew much faster, were much more active, and consumed more crickets when supplemented daily with absolute calcium. With all the money people spend on lights and calcium carbonate (which your animal cannot make use of), ABSOLUTE CALCIUM is a must have product for owning and breeding reptiles in the 21st century! I recommend that everyone try absolute calcium for yourself and see the difference in your pet immediately.
Jason Couch, Vancouver, WA

I have a bearded dragon whose joints were swollen, and was walking strange. I was told by another reptile lover that he lacked calcium, and he gave me a supplement to give him. His symptoms did not improve. So, I tried a couple of other types of calcium, and still no improvement. I found out about ABSOLUTE Calcium and was somewhat reluctant to even give it a try. But I did, and sure enough, within a couple weeks he was moving normal and his joints had returned to normal size. I couldn't understand it but am so grateful. I love my dragon! It doesn't do any good to give supplements that aren't in the form the reptile can use.
Cameron Reynolds, Lansing, MI

I have several reptiles and take supplements myself, so I understand how important "whole food" is. Studies have been done where scientists have actually found undigested vitamins and minerals in fecal matter. I am glad ABSOLUTE Calcium has put calcium in a way that the reptile can use the nutrients to benefit itself. Thank you ABSOLUTE Calcium!
Aspen Davis, Price, UT

GET YOUR ABSOLUTE CALCIUM TODAY AND SEE THE COLOR POTENTIAL LOCKED AWAY IN YOUR REPTILE'S GENES! THIS PRODUCT WILL MAXIMIZE THE COLOR POTENTIAL OF YOUR REPTILE!
Order now and see the improvement in your animals immediately! Simply click below to order online with your credit card or echeck, or mail a money order to:
Jason Couch P.O. Box 11151 Yakima, WA 98903
Only $12.95 and that includes shipping!
 
Old 04-15-2005, 04:56 AM   #2
WingedWolf
LMAO!!!! A testimonial for his own product...took me a bit of searching to spot that!
 
Old 04-15-2005, 05:57 AM   #3
DAND
He must of liked the product soooo much that he has become a distibutor.
 
Old 04-15-2005, 08:35 AM   #4
cthulhu77
You have to give him some credit for cajones, though...as that ad certainly required ! Why, oh why, oh why...
greg
 
Old 04-15-2005, 12:57 PM   #5
Intense Herpetoculture
I laughed for quite some time. I saw the ad, read a small bit, and was thinking, something is not right, this seems fake. Sure enough, he put his own name on the testimonials! I had a feeling this was a crook of a product, liek that parazap stuff, which he is also selling. That post only help to support my theory.
 
Old 04-15-2005, 01:22 PM   #6
Bringerofdoom
I knew the ad was misleading, but i did not notice he has his own testimonial to it. Thats funny.

The whole reptiles assimlating their product had me rolling. Out of all the words to use they chose assimilate. lol Granted its a proper word, but how often do you ever hear it used like it should? It's like saying "I am going to eat dinner, then assimilate it." I guess he is just trying to look smarter than he is........
 
Old 04-16-2005, 01:05 PM   #7
WingedWolf
As the Komodo dragon says, you will be assimilated!
 
Old 04-16-2005, 10:50 PM   #8
cthulhu77
Well, I should not have "assimilated" two Arby's beefncheddars with jalapenos this afternoon either...ooof.
greg

maybe i need some calcium...
 
Old 04-17-2005, 03:10 PM   #9
Karen Hulvey
Quote:
Originally Posted by cthulhu77
maybe i need some calcium...
That's Absolute calcium! LOLOLOL
 

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