Connie (Mrs. WebSlave)

Well, there is a small silver lining in this HUGE cloud I have been living in lately. Lost weight from eating sparsely, and getting back into working outside in the yard. Down to 132.6 lbs now. Not feeling much like the decrepit old man I felt I was being transformed into by circumstances.
 

Attachments

  • selfie_001_smaller.jpg
    selfie_001_smaller.jpg
    43.2 KB · Views: 108
Dude, the old ladies on the meat market are gonna chase you! I hope you're a fast runner.
 
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Not to worry. I am NOT going to date someone who looks like my grandmother or my Aunt Edna. :rofl:

To be honest, I have been checking out the internet dating sites, and to be blunt, there is slim pickings there.

But I am fully prepared to live the rest of my life alone, if it comes to that.

Connie would insist that I be HAPPY with someone new. Matter of fact, before she died, she said to me that she needs to find me a girl friend to be with me after she died. That is just like her. Always concerned and worried about my welfare even though she was in dire straights herself.
 
Ah, well. It was 2 years ago today that Connie got the diagnosis of stage 4 metastatic ovarian cancer.

Been working out on the property a lot clearing the underbrush and small trees to open up the woods some. Been using the wood chipper on the tractor to turn all those small trees, vines, and brush piles into little wood chips. Interestingly enough, while I was out there today I was carrying an armload of branches and roots I had cut off of some of the trees to the chipper when I moved to readjust the weight distribution. I suddenly felt a very sharp pain in my left chest. First thing that went through my mind was "well I guess my time here on Earth is done. About time..." I didn't expect that thought. But in any event, just turned out to be a sharp root jabbing me in the chest, so I am still here. :shrug01:

As for the internet dating stuff.... I am a complete flop at it. No closer to finding someone than I was when I started. Have yet to have any real offers to meet anyone in person. Not unless I want to send them money for airfare or gasoline. So it looks like that is a complete bust. Being 73 years old is certainly putting me behind the eight ball. That and I guess I just am not anyone's heart throb. Oh well..........
 
I went to doctors last week. Weight was 208 on a 6'3" frame. Doctor acted like I was 300 pounds. My best friend is female and if wife passed I would never get remarried but I'd be happy with my buddy going to movie or zoo and having lunches and dinners. I'm retiring in August. Planning to get a 2 or 3 day job at Ace Hardware or maybe mowing just a few small yards in neighborhood. I hope you get everything sorted in your new life Rich!
 
Thanks, but I really wouldn't exactly call this a "life".........
 
WebSlave said:
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Not to worry. I am NOT going to date someone who looks like my grandmother or my Aunt Edna. :rofl:

To be honest, I have been checking out the internet dating sites, and to be blunt, there is slim pickings there.

But I am fully prepared to live the rest of my life alone, if it comes to that.
Click to expand...

Just to show you the semi local beauties that like me...... :ack2:

Am I being shallow by not looking for some inner beauty?
 

Attachments

  • eharmony_01.jpg
    eharmony_01.jpg
    25.3 KB · Views: 53
Been 9 months now since Connie passed away.

Can't really say things are getting better, just different. Hard to explain in what way things feel different. Maybe it is that I feel that this is now becoming real and I am not expecting (hoping?) to awaken from this nightmare. This is the rest of my life.....
 
WebSlave said:
Been 9 months now since Connie passed away.

Can't really say things are getting better, just different. Hard to explain in what way things feel different. Maybe it is that I feel that this is now becoming real and I am not expecting (hoping?) to awaken from this Only speaking for myself, of course, it doesn't get better; you just learn how to live with the differences.
Click to expand...

WebSlave said:
Been 9 months now since Connie passed away.

Can't really say things are getting better, just different. Hard to explain in what way things feel different. Maybe it is that I feel that this is now becoming real and I am not expecting (hoping?) to awaken from this nightmare. This is the rest of my life.....
Click to expand...
Only speaking for myself, of course, things don't get better; you just learn how to live with the differences, and what your new life has become. I liken it to leaving the house, getting a few miles away, and getting that nagging feeling that something is wrong. Did I unplug the percolator? Check the animals? Did I grab my phone, purse, receipt or whatever documents I need?
Nothing earth-shattering, but just that mild anxiety. I think I live most of the time with a mild anxiety that something isn't right.
 
When Connie knew she was dying, she made me promise that I wouldn't do anything drastic for 3 months after she was gone. She said that she hoped that the pain I would feel from her memories would eventually change into happiness at the thought of her instead of sadness. This has not happened yet. If anything, it has gotten worse. But I told her I would not do anything for a year. I am really REALLY dreading that anniversary date of her dying.....
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top