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The one!

Southern Wolf

Southern Wolf

I don't bite..... HARD!!!
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So for all of ya'll out there that have found someone.... how did you know that person was the one for you?

I thought about doing a poll... but realized there was no way I could guess all the correct answers..... so just post your answer.

What did you partner do that made you think..... This is who I want to be with... they are THE ONE!

I hope that some of our married members will also chime in. Could be interesting to read some of the answers.... and ya never know. You may not be alone in having the same trigger points as someone else.
 
33 views already.... and surely to goodness they aint all by single folks. Comeon folks... dont be skeeert!
 
I know some might say "How can you know that Kevin is the one, the one you know is right for you, you haven't even met him yet!" But i do know that in my heart, you are the one for me. One thing that made me think that, is you are getting on a plane for me, to come spend 8 days with me up here in Massachusetts, and i know that is extremely difficult with you.
But the biggest thing for me was that you are willing to step into the role of Daddy with my twins, one that a lot of guys would go running from. You are willing to make sacrifices for them,and for me.
In my eyes, and my heart, you are the only one for me, babe, and i'm counting down the days until August 24th:D
 
For me, it was after I had my first argument with hubby (before marriage), and realized I still wanted to see him the next day!

I wasn't desperate..I was still actively dating, so this was the narrowing point where I realized that I didn't WANT to date anyone else.
 
It wasn't until my boyfriend had emergency brain surgery that I realized just how strong our bond is. He had a subdural hematoma (bleeding around his brain) due to a kick from a martial arts tournament, and was having neurological symptoms. I spent every waking moment by his side in the hospital for the entire month he was there. Something about the intensity of that entire situation...the fact that I could have lost him during surgery or afterward...it really took our relationship to a different level.
 
Ditto, Lucille - so obviously not qualified to provide insightful uh .... insight. LOL.
 
There isnt a "one" , that's fantasyland IMO. There are probably tens of thousands of people in the world with whom most people could have a succcessful LTR. Fewer for some ;) who may be more challenging personalities ahem some herpers I know. It isn't a "one" thing, cmon give yourself more credit than that! No matter who it is, it's just realistically very hard work and a willingness on both partners part to work at the relationship. To give and to take and to compromise and to soften one's heart when angry etc. Basically the "one" is anyone who makes your heart happy to be around, who shares a general outlook on things (opposites atttract but usually flame out over time) and creates this willingness to work hard for a long time in you.
 
meisen said:
There isnt a "one" , that's fantasyland IMO. There are probably tens of thousands of people in the world with whom most people could have a succcessful LTR. Fewer for some ;) who may be more challenging personalities ahem some herpers I know. It isn't a "one" thing, cmon give yourself more credit than that! No matter who it is, it's just realistically very hard work and a willingness on both partners part to work at the relationship. To give and to take and to compromise and to soften one's heart when angry etc. Basically the "one" is anyone who makes your heart happy to be around, who shares a general outlook on things (opposites atttract but usually flame out over time) and creates this willingness to work hard for a long time in you.
Click to expand...

I think of the "One" as this is the one that I would work hardest to keep because he fits me on so many mental and physical levels (if that makes sense).

I have had several "Ones" some last, some don't as we grow in different directions.
 
deborahbroadus said:
I think of the "One" as this is the one that I would work hardest to keep because he fits me on so many mental and physical levels (if that makes sense).

I have had several "Ones" some last, some don't as we grow in different directions.
Click to expand...

Makes sense to me. And yeah, thats my point, you have already had more than one "the one". Investing heavily in a something that isn't working based on the idea that this person must be the one is a bad plan. You have to see the same kind of commitment on their part as your own or it will likely continue be a lopsided relationship.
 
This is one thing that stands out to me.

Back before me and Crissy had even thought about each other as far as relationships go we were talking via PM. Sometimes about stuff on the forum... sometimes not. I had told her about my weight loss goals and she said she would try to keep me motiviated so I could reach those goals... even though she thought I didnt need to loose any weight.

Fast forward a bit and we decided we have enough in common thru just normal convos that we discuss trying to make a relationship work.

Fast forward to last night..... Crissy asked me if I had been going riding (bought a mtn bike to help with the weight loss) and on schedule. Ummmmmm well........ no **looks to the floor**

She doesn't even think I need to loose the weight but she proceeded to scold me because I had fallen off my routine and it was something I wanted to do. She is willing to support me in my goals even though she doesnt think I need to loose weight.

To me... that says alot and I would like to say thanks to Crissy for helping me reach my goals. It takes me about 30 mins to make my 3.2 mile circle, and one of the reasons I havent been going this week is even at midnight it is freakin hot and humid. I now have a solution for that... I have been granted access to a pool (even at midnight).... so on the nights Its really hot and humid... then I'll just do laps for 30 mins instead of the ride.
 
Southern Wolf said:
This is one thing that stands out to me.

Back before me and Crissy had even thought about each other as far as relationships go we were talking via PM. Sometimes about stuff on the forum... sometimes not. I had told her about my weight loss goals and she said she would try to keep me motiviated so I could reach those goals... even though she thought I didnt need to loose any weight.

Fast forward a bit and we decided we have enough in common thru just normal convos that we discuss trying to make a relationship work.

Fast forward to last night..... Crissy asked me if I had been going riding (bought a mtn bike to help with the weight loss) and on schedule. Ummmmmm well........ no **looks to the floor**

She doesn't even think I need to loose the weight but she proceeded to scold me because I had fallen off my routine and it was something I wanted to do. She is willing to support me in my goals even though she doesnt think I need to loose weight.

To me... that says alot and I would like to say thanks to Crissy for helping me reach my goals. It takes me about 30 mins to make my 3.2 mile circle, and one of the reasons I havent been going this week is even at midnight it is freakin hot and humid. I now have a solution for that... I have been granted access to a pool (even at midnight).... so on the nights Its really hot and humid... then I'll just do laps for 30 mins instead of the ride.
Click to expand...



Babe, i want you to be happy with yourself, and i will support you in whatever you decide to do in life, case in point, your weight loss goals. And i know you will support me when the time comes for me to lose all the baby weight i will have gained by the time the girls are born.

I had a feeling you had fallen behind on your bike riding, that's why i asked you about it last night. You will feel so good when you reach your goal, and i will be so proud of you for sticking with it and achieving it.

Until then, i will continue to be your own personal cheerleader:D:D
 
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