NEWTS! At NARBC Tinley Park, IL March 19-20

WARNING: If long ads offend, upset or trigger you, turn back now baby. I like to be thorough with my listings to leave as few unanswered questions as possible so you don't feel compelled to message me with questions.

I'll have the following available for pick up only at NARBC Tinley Park, IL March 19-20th at the Chicago Reptile House booth. Just look for some guys with tubs of water and amphibians. All equal opportunity: first come, first served, no exceptions. I guess people get confused by the part where I always mention "pick up only" so let me explain. Basically what it means is I won't be putting the animal in a box and shipping it to you. Others also seem to have a hard time understanding the meaning of "first come, first served". It simply means the first to be at the table and buy them, gets them. This accomplishes several things that are important to me including but not limited to: minimizing the time I need to deal with you lunatics while maximizing the time I have to deal with newts. It prevents you, me and the animals from playing roulette with shipping delays and incompetent couriers who don't care about doing their jobs correctly. This stops people who see the ad first from being the first to get the animals (some of us have jobs and lives and can't watch the classifieds all day). Most importantly, it helps prevent people from pretending to be my friend because they think they'll somehow get priority over anyone else. Everyone is your friend when they want something from you, where were you guys when I wanted a loan for my house? Get to the back of the line, chump! This is the wrong season to be looking for captive bred newts. Take that fact and combine it with the fact there has been a stronger demand for captive bred newts this year than ever before and you will understand why the supply is limited. Also, I'll give you some free advice. If your plan is to try to get your newts to breed, which should be your goal with rare species, and you are only able to get unsexed juveniles you are much better off getting a big group to ensure you get some of both sexes. I'm not trying to upsell you or anything like that, but it's just much easier to find people willing to take adult newts later than try to find people willing to trade you sexed adults when you realize you have five males. I'm know I'm not willing to throw off the sex ratio of my personal collection to help you and most others will agree.

All animals have been kept mostly aquatic (in hard alkaline aged tap water) in heavily planted/established aquariums, feeding mainly on generic frozen bloodworms, occasionally chopped Canadian nightcrawlers (NOT European nightcrawlers or red wigglers you bought at Walmart) and live adult brine shrimp gut loaded on either dry Haematococcus algae suspended in water or live Tetraselmis phytoplankton that I culture here.

I guarantee the animals are healthy and have been eating for me when I hand them to you but, due to the delicate nature and specific requirements of amphibians, that's the extent of the guarantee. Everything you do with them is completely out of my control. I can give you a banana bread recipe, but if you deviate from the recipe a little bit and use apples instead we won't get the same results if you know what I mean.

The number in parenthesis () denotes the minimum quantity I'll have at the start of the day Saturday. (start of the day meaning when vendors and VIP are allowed in, not when the show opens to the public)

(10)Triturus pygmaeus juveniles (this is not the bright lime green variety you found in the ten second google search you just did, they're usually darker) $60 each

(1.1)Triturus pygmaeus proven pair $200/pair

(10)Triturus marmoratus juveniles $45 each

(1.1)Triturus carnifex juveniles sexed pair (possible het flavistic) $70/pair

(3.3)Triturus carnifex 2-3 year old proven pairs $120/pair

(6)Triturus carnifex flavistic juveniles (see photographic proof of their father's sex appeal below) $70 each

(1.1)Triturus dobrogicus pair currently breeding, the easiest of the genus Triturus to get to breed in an aquarium $80/pair

(15)Lissotriton vulgaris-my favorite species of newt and they can be yours too for only $15 each

(1.2)Lissotriton vulgaris trio currently breeding $80/trio

(12)Neurergus crocatus juveniles $55 each

(10)Hypselotriton cyanurus juveniles $25 each

(10)Ichthyosaura alpestris apuanus juveniles $15 each

Axolotls

Thanks to Fortnite, TikTok and Minecraft, there is a stronger demand for these now than ever before. I don't play the games these people who are new to axolotls play. If you use any ignorant terms like "walking fish" or "purple" or "bluegill" or "sunburst" I won't sell you anything and I promise to humiliate you. Most of these "new" color morphs are not new at all. In fact, some have been around and documented for decades but the axolotl mommies of facebook all believe theirs are special. I've been raising these things for about 18 years now and am now reasonably sure most of them are not special at all!

Assorted colors, juveniles with four limbs eating frozen bloodworms $25 each (no quantity discount, just get away from me!)

USARK Auction:

I don't know what these are worth, but I do know they're probably worth more than I would sell them for so you can decide when you place your bids at the USARK auction Saturday night. It's for a good cause. What's that? Oh you don't like USARK because you think they're the NRA of reptile keeping? Well you can just go sit on your thumb in the corner while your rights are plucked away one at a time. Sorry you grew up to be such a turkey and an embarrassment to your whole famdamily!

(1.1) *Proven breeding pair* Ommatotriton ophryticus- Ah yes, the holy grail of newts. This pair bred last year and produced MANY offspring but I didn't put them in water this year. I'm sure anyone else would sell them for hundreds or thousands of dollars so.....happy bidding! (photo of partially erect male last year below)

(1) Axolotl mutant. This is a one year old male gold albino with patches of black all over and white on his side similar to the scrotum wing budgett's frog morph you see offered occasionally at the same booth. (I'll post photos in comments later on) I see other fools offering these things for $1,000+ from time to time. It is not hereditary, it's a fluke. If this was a recessive gene EVERYONE WOULD ALREADY HAVE THEM. Anyone claiming this or any other mutation is recessive without proof probably also claims they have the biggest collection of captive salamanders with absolutely no proof at all...and they're a liar. Shocking!!

Calico axolotl

I'll post in the fall when I have more. I only sell them at shows, never ship or meet up with anyone, sorry, I just really don't like people, only newts.