Rich,
I spoke with Kelli at length last night, and it quite frankly it was the "fiasco comment" that started all of this. To make a long story short, she thought that you were referring to the Hayden auction as a fiasco...and it hurt her deeply (as the comment was taken out of context, i.e. misunderstood). I think that it's important to remember that Kelli has endured a hell over the past year that I wouldn't wish on any parent. IMO it's easy to understand how she could react emotionally to a perceived slight of an effort that was in memoriam of her son.
You and I both know that a certain amount of Chris' efforts were self "inflating," and Chris has certainly displayed his real character over the past several months. The important thing for everyone to recognize here is that the "fiasco" was between you and Chris...NOT between you and the efforts by many members of the reptile community to help Kelli and her family during their time of need. I know that you will agree with me that the efforts that people made to help Kelli and her family were NOT a fiasco.
In talking with Kelli, and explaining a little bit of the back story, and where you were coming from with your comment, she admitted that she had reacted emotionally to what you had said based on a misunderstanding of your intentions. Quite frankly, she was mad at you for things that you never really said (or meant to say)...she was hurt. I pointed out to Kelli that the main info that she had based her assumptions on was the info that Chris gave her when he called her almost a year ago and told her how you were trying to shut down the efforts of people trying to help her and her family. I also pointed out that I didn't believe for a second that what Chris told her wasn't extremely biased, and that Chris had every intention of painting you in a bad light to Kelli. So...here's poor Kelli, who has just suffered the most horrific loss that she could ever imagine, and Chris bombards her with this garbage. Do you think that she even had the capacity to objectively consider what Chris was telling her? No way...no one could have. She reacted emotionally, and was hurt and angry...just like any of us would have been. However, after everything was said and done, she chose to put those hurts aside and just "move on." She had already been through enough, and the last thing she needed was more drama, strife, or hurt in her life. However, it would have been impossible for her to forget it.
Now...fast forward almost a year, and you made the "fiasco" comment. Given the history, and the feelings that she had tried to put aside, it starts to become more clear as to why/how she could have taken what you said out of context. She was hurt, she was angry, she was in pain...a pain that few people could ever truly empathize with. Then, in what she thought was a private conversation, that pain came out...and you ended up being hurt by it.
As Kelli and I discussed everything, she made a very astute comment. She said that if Chris had truly been concerned for her well being, then he never would have made that call and told her the things that he did. Chris did what he did in an effort to hurt you, and in so doing he didn't just hurt you...he hurt Kelli. Chris only cared about making himself look good. Ultimately, Chris' action hurt you, Kelli, Fauna, Kelli's new forum, and the members of both.
Rich, Kelli does not hate you...she was hurt by you. There's a big difference. There is little doubt in my mind that if the two of you would just sit down and talk that you would realize that all of this drama is completely unnecessary. She doesn't want this, and I don't believe for a second that you do either...and neither one of you should fall prey to the people on both sides who are attempting to be self serving by trying to perpetuate the drama between the two or you.
Additionally, I know that Marcia regrets ever making the initial post as she has said so multiple times on the other forum. She is certainly not a hateful person. Rather she had a momentary lapse of judgment in which she vented her feelings of frustration in what she thought was a private conversation. Marcia regrets this, Kelli regrets this, and I am certain that you regret it. You are all three very intelligent, thoughtful people, and I hate to see your friendships torn apart by people who have nothing better to do than jump on board and fan the flames of the latest internet drama. None of this strife is necessary...how about picking up the phone? I know that Kelli would like to talk with you, and work this garbage out...she told me so.
