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Spending money

Lucille

Lucille

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I was on another board and saw how someone posted that he wanted to buy one more item for a collection he had, but his wife said if he bought one more thing she was going to leave.

To me, if the bills are paid and each person has some spending money, one person has no right to tell the other what they can and cannot purchase.

However, I thought for a while more and while in general I think that people have the right to buy what they please no matter how frivolous it might seem to me, I came up with a few exceptions, if a significant other were to buy the following items I would get ticked off:

1) Spiders, especially those big honkin' tarantulas they sell in pet shops, I really hate spiders
2) Hookers (needs no explanation)
3) Illegal stuff
4) Pets that they would expect ME to take care of. (I have pets but I chose them, I would resent it if someone bought a cat or something and then expected ME to clean the catbox and all that stuff).

What do y'all think? Should you be able to buy what you want with your money, as long as the bills are paid?
 
The only thing I would add to that list is tattoos, just because of the number of men out there who will go out and get them made despite knowing their wife wouldn't like it. You can take back a spider or pet, but you can't get rid of a tattoo. It'll just always be there to remind you that your input apparently doesn't matter to your partner. :rolleyes:
 
I agree with you Lucille!! As long as the bills are paid and they are spending the "leftovers" equally, it really shouldn't matter.

Xelda, why should the spouse have to agree to "let" the other get a tattoo? My opinion is that if I want a tattoo and my spouse is an understanding and loving person that cares about my wants and needs, they would not try to stop me. Now, helping me decide what is appropriate or meaningful enough to get tattooed with, is a great way to be a part of our spouses decision.

I feel they are to many spouses that think "were married and you can't do that if I don't want you too" and end up hurting the marriage. Even though we're married, we are still individuals that can resent the other for "forcing" the decision. But, thats just my 2 cents. LOL!!
 
It all comes down to one word: Respect. I respect my Husband's right to be an individual even though we're married. We have a junkyard (his) and a zoo (mine). I couldn't be happier! :)
 
Depends.
If he said he wanted to gamble the money away I would have a problem with it..I also have a problem with lazy waste.
If a TV is cheaper 3 stores down and you are too lazy to walk to save a few hundred dollars then I will probably say somthing about it. No one ever has so much money where waste should be a factor.
 
lucille said:
I was on another board and saw how someone posted that he wanted to buy one more item for a collection he had, but his wife said if he bought one more thing she was going to leave.

To me, if the bills are paid and each person has some spending money, one person has no right to tell the other what they can and cannot purchase.

However, I thought for a while more and while in general I think that people have the right to buy what they please no matter how frivolous it might seem to me, I came up with a few exceptions, if a significant other were to buy the following items I would get ticked off:

1) Spiders, especially those big honkin' tarantulas they sell in pet shops, I really hate spiders
2) Hookers (needs no explanation)
3) Illegal stuff
4) Pets that they would expect ME to take care of. (I have pets but I chose them, I would resent it if someone bought a cat or something and then expected ME to clean the catbox and all that stuff).

What do y'all think? Should you be able to buy what you want with your money, as long as the bills are paid?
Click to expand...


Ok I agree with the spider issue. I just can't find it in myself to even pick one up. :(

Hookers.. Reminds me of a little joke I read recently. What do bungee jumping and hookers have in common? If the rubber breaks you are dead. (maybe a little too crude and if so feel free to edit it out)

Illegal stuff?? That is a pretty broad one there. I mean one could make the legal purchase of a handgun into something illegal by robbing a local bank. Same with an automobile if they decided to drink and drive. By this broad definition almost anything bought for legal use could be turned into something illegal if the person so made the choice to make it such. Now if you were using this definition in reference to drug use I fully agree. But I am at the point to not even consider pot an illegal drug as we have much more serious drugs out there which are ruining people's lives. Just look at the meth epidemic which spread across the country like a politician during election year.

But in all honesty this is a free country and if someone has "disposable income" to spend on something it is their choice to make. But I would hope they look into the future when using such income on pets. They might have enough to properly care for the animal now but what happens in the future if they loose a job or get ill? When buying living creatures you have to look way down the road if you are responsible. If you don't we get unwanted pets at animal shelters, rescue organizations, or even worse released into the wild. All these things effect us as they make us look bad in the public eye.
 
Alot of that may depend on the division of spending money. Alot of couples have only joint accounts, regardless of their incomes or spending habits. I value my financial freedom too much, and have been in situations that made that situation very undesirable. Currently, my wife and I have a joint account for household bills...and we each maintain separate accounts for our own vices. The only time I say anything about her spending habits is when she dips into the joint account on a regular basis and the funds are not there when needed. Other than that - whatever we want, we buy. She did express some displeasure at my last tattoo...but that was only because I did it while she was out of town. It was "I don't believe you went without me", not "What the heck were you thinking".
 
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