The Ice Fishing Contest

[Glenn Bartley]

Once upon a time, not too long ago there was a Presidential election that was too close to call. Neither the Republican presidential candidate nor the Democratic presidential candidate had enough votes to win the election. Therefore, it was decided that there should be an ice fishing contest between the two candidates to determine the final winner. There was much
talk about ballot recounting, court challenges, etc., but a week-long ice fishing competition seemed the (manly) way to settle things.

The candidate that catches the most fish at the end of the week wins. After a lot of back and forth discussion, it was decided that the contest would take place on a remote and cold lake in Wisconsin. There were to be no observers present, and both men were to be sent out separately on this remote lake and return daily with their catch for counting and verification. At the end of the first day, George W. returns to the starting line and he has 10 fish.

Soon, Al Gore returns and has zero fish. Well, everyone assumes Al is just having another bad hair day or something and hopefully, he will catch up the next day. At the end of the 2nd day George W. comes in with 20 fish and Al Gore comes in again with none.

That evening, Bill Clinton gets together secretly with Al and says, "Al, I think George W. is a lowlife cheatin' son-of-a-gun. I want you to go out tomorrow and don't even bother with fishing. Just spy on him and see if he is cheating in any way. The next night (after George W. comes back with 50 fish), Bill Clinton says to Al, "Well, what about it, is George W. cheatin'?"

"He sure is, Bill, he's cutting holes in the ice."

 

[Neil Gubitz]

Glenn.... ya know why Poles don't go ice-fishing?? It takes them too long to dig a hole big enough for the BOAT!

Ya know why Poles don't go elephant hunting?
Decoys are too heavy!

Ya know why Poles don't go duck hunting?
They can't throw their dogs high enough!

An American and a Pole go after the same job at the phone company.... the manager says, "Which ever one of you can put in the most telephone poles in one day, gets the job".... at the end of the day, the American says that he put in 6 telephone poles.... the Pole says he only put in 2.... when the manager asks why only 2.... the Pole says, "Well, he might have put in 6 telephone poles, but did you see how much he left sticking out of the ground??

....Neil

 

[Glenn Bartley]

Now you have got me wondering: is Al Gore or George W. of Polish descent?


That one about the telephone poles was great!

 

[dragonmageneo]

Now why did that first one have to be in Wisconsin, like we would let either of them in here
-Tony Goodwill-