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to those who date girls

TooManyBurmese

TooManyBurmese

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How would you like to be approached. And I don't mean by a girl you'd want to "do" then leave. I mean if you were on the prowl for a relationship (long or short term) how would you prefer someone else to come on to you?

I am very shy, but I think it's time I did some aggressive maneuvers!
 
I do not date girls; but I think the generally accepted ways to meet people are the same everywhere unless there are particular cultural requirements to be met.

In the old days (yes, I am older, but this was even before my time lol) a young lady would pass by a young man she was interested in and drop her (hopefully unused) handkerchief. He would retrieve it and in handing in back begin a conversation....

This is the time honored way for women to meet men: to show interest in a non direct, non threatening manner that allows the particular man not to respond if he so wishes, the relationship many times actually begins in a stronger and surer way when both parties feel they have more freedom and control over their choice.

These days, assertive behavior by a female is more accepted and sometimes even welcome, aggressive behavior unless you are dealing with motorcycle gangs or convicts generally is not a good first move.

Ideas:

Online dating services: I have met both good people and bad on an online meeting service. Be careful; but after all since these days time is at a premium and it may be difficult to find exactly what you are looking for, this is one way to screen people and find what you want. One advantage is that most of them are sorted into geographical areas so you can meet someone who lives within a reasonable distance. There are some flakes online, but there are also good honest people who truly want to begin a relationship. One note: be wary of people who have had a membership for many years, they are not about to settle down although after all that experience they would be a fun casual date.

Websites: You could find someone here on Fauna and meet them at a reptile show

Real life: Meet someone in a common group: school, church, etc. I have never made a long term friend from anyone met at a bar(and I do not drink anyway).
 
Oh know....

I can see whats coming next! Yes, the new Dating BOI forum.

Don't date so-and-so, etc.... Imagine all the interesting conversations then.
 
Shoot, honey; Webslave has his hands full just monitoring the snake trade on Fauna, if he had to figure out who got points in a lover's spat it would just put him over the edge, lol....:D
 
sirenofthestorm said:
lol doesn't it drive everyone nuts figuring out who's in the right or wrong in a lover's spat?
Click to expand...

I thought the guy was always wrong. Looks like I may be wrong again, but then... I'd be right.

This is too confusing.
 
He deserves more than a medal, somebody give him a bj.
I am glad to see at least SOME discriminating, intelligent gentlemen who know us women are always right.......
 
TooManyBurmese said:
How would you like to be approached. And I don't mean by a girl you'd want to "do" then leave. I mean if you were on the prowl for a relationship (long or short term) how would you prefer someone else to come on to you?

I am very shy, but I think it's time I did some aggressive maneuvers!
Click to expand...





Aggressive huh?? You want some tips from the old play book or shall I just tell everyone here my trade secrets?

And me and monogomy do not get along so as you can see there is a certain "issue" with any woman who thinks I am relationship material. ;)
 
We all know about you, Brian. I think as a matter of fact you would be a perfect mentor; however private emails to the person would definitely be the way to go, as the world is not ready for your 'trade secrets'.

This in one situation where you can use the knowledge and skills you have gained over the years to really assist someone who is reaching out for exactly that kind of help. I hope you will take some of your time to help her.
 
lucille said:
We all know about you, Brian. I think as a matter of fact you would be a perfect mentor; however private emails to the person would definitely be the way to go, as the world is not ready for your 'trade secrets'.

This in one situation where you can use the knowledge and skills you have gained over the years to really assist someone who is reaching out for exactly that kind of help. I hope you will take some of your time to help her.
Click to expand...



Think about what you said really well now. ME giving advice on picking up women is one thing, but god knows I am really bad at monogomy so advice on relationships is somewhat suspect at best from me. ;)
 
Danni, it looks like you and I are close to the same age, so I can understand your point of view. I'm not the dating type, so it was a big step for me when I asked a guy out for the first time. He paid for the meal too. :)

Although it's becoming more acceptable for women to take the initiative, the majority of women still don't have the guts to ask a man out. Hence, most men find it pleasantly surprising when they do get asked out, especially by shy quiet girls they totally don't expect that from. This already puts you in an advantageous position. I think if you detect that an available guy is attracted to you but he's not making any moves, initiative is good. Your chances of rejection are slim as long as you don't scare the guy off by stalking him, calling him every hour, or talking to all of his guy friends about him (thus giving them the impression that you are a stalker type).

Whatever you decide to do, good luck!
 
the best way to a mans heart is through( yep you guesed it) his tummy. invite the guy to dinner at your house.after a few hours of conversation you will have a good idea of his intentions. also church singles groups are a good place to meet nice marrage minded men.
 
Olivia, wow, that's something to think about. I think I would definately be considered shy. I also tend not to stalk hee hee, which I guess is another plus for me. The first step would be finding someone who is attracted to me hee hee. I am not exactly surrounding myself with eligible singles. I work, come home, and hide away. I guess I need to boot myself in the bottom and get out there.

Church singles? Now that is something I have never heard of! I will definately look into that. If I can find someone with a similar faith as me (I am a "believer" but not a church goer) that would be fantastic. Maybe part of me has been empty because I have not been fulfilling that need...
 
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