Info Need some advice on a situation involving Alea Rodriguez.

[Big Time Reptiles]

Maybe if people read what I have said, understood it before replying in wouldn't feel so attacked with constantly being told "you're just trying to justify keeping them" when I said several times I wasn't and that I don't want them. "Ship them now" who would you blame if they got held up and died? Me. "Wait to ship till warmer weather" ok I've said many many times that's what I wanted all along, yet people keep saying it like I never agreed to. "You shouldn't ask for payment for past expenses that makes you look bad" I NEVER said I wanted that, but compensation from here on out for rats at least. You know it does take money to breed them, feed them, keep them clean, euthanize, and freeze. And basically ke caring enough about her animals to not send them out in freezing temps and holiday rush makes me a bad guy because "they're not my animals so not my problem" sorry I care about their lives and health. All she had to do long ago when she got settled was get tubes, heat tape, a stat and get them back and work on more caging should she wish, not leave me spending more and more money to care for her animals while parading around new animals she just bought in my face. Again I tried to send 3 back in the summer she said no and got new animals. I would have been 3 lighter and she would have had half back but she chose to buy new animals instead of getting the ones I have back.

You just won't quit.....

GOOD LUCK with your situation!

Lynn Peterson
Big Time reptiles

 

[ElexisC]

You gave Elea's name in your inquiry post. If you mention names, it's a BOI issue, not a general inquiry. This was explained to you clearly in the response. As far as your infraction, that's at the moderator's discretion.



Yes, you are....



You have continuously ignored the many posts that say although you could safely ship in these temperature conditions, we understand why you don't want to do it, especially given the holiday season. You have no leg to stand on here, stop bringing it up.



They're her animals. Whether or not she has adequate caging is up to her, not you. This is completely irrelevant to the actual problem, and you come off as wanting to keep the animals, despite your assertion that you don't want them.



That's your problem and honestly irrelevant. She'll likely contact you in the spring. She has wisely bowed out of the conversation and I suggest you do the same. At this point, the only one making you look bad is yourself.



No, you are misinterpreting the responses you got because we don't agree with you 100% on everything. Again, the professional victim act is getting irritating.



Because it's 100% irrelevant to the actual issue. You have her snakes. It's not up to you to make this judgement call. Return the snakes when you can. End of story.



She agreed to wait until spring to ship. She'll probably contact you then, or go through a third party. A couple of folks already posted here who are part of the Facebook group where this drama started. Ask them to moderate your conversation. Being out of contact is a poor excuse when there are ways to get around it. Again, you are starting to sound like you actually do want to keep this snakes by the way you are phrasing your responses.

Keep in mind that BOI posts are equally about the accuser as the accused. Your name is attached here. So far I am unimpressed. I was siding with you from the beginning despite how you misinterpreted my statements, but now my sympathy for your situation is pretty much gone.

I really don't care if your sympathy is gone. You are picking apart what I'm saying and making your own assumptions. And no it's NOT IRRELEVANT!!!! IT IS THE REASON I STILL HAVE *HER* SNAKES!!!!! I WANTED TO SEND AT LEAST HALF BACK WHEN SHE HAD CAGES AND SHE FILLED THEM WITH NEW ANIMALS!!!!! THAT'S NOT IRRELEVANT THAT SHOWS SHE WAS USING THIS TO THE FULLEST ON MY DIME NOW WANTS TO PLAY VICTIM AND LIE! You don't want to understand what I'm actually saying, obviously haven't read posts or flat out ignored. If she cannot work out terms now and iron everything out now civilly instead of making it look like im holding them hostage when i try later on when she *finally desides she wants them* then she obviously doesn't care too much about them. Again I DO NOT WANT THEM no matter how you try to spin it against me I DON'T WANT THEM!!!!!!! Why would I try to send 3 back in the summer if I was trying to keep them?

And nice try at that one section where I said I could have sold them for her, she was actually going to have me sell them before, but of course she never mentioned that. She has said several times she just wants to sell them and be done with it all. If she said to, I could have sold them and sent her the money that was the point of that statement.

 

[missred]

I am formerly giving HERPS ALIVE FOUNDATION PERMISSION TO TAKE POSSESSION OF 2 RED TAIL BOAS (MALE SURINAME SMALL FEMALE HYPO, IS NOT TO INCLUDE THE LARGER FEMALE HYPO REDRAIL I GAVE ELEXIS AS GIFT AND PAYMENT) 2 CARPET PYTHONS MALE AND FEMALE JUNGLE AND IRIAN JAYA 1 FEMALE DUMERILS AND 1 MALE RAINBOW BOA. A TOTAL OF 6 SNAKES. HERPS ALIVE FOUNDATION HAS MY FULL PERMISSION TO TAKE POSSESSION OF THE ANIMALS STATED ABOVE. PICTURES HAVE BEEN PROVIDED TO THEM FOR IDENTIFICATION

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[Herps Alive!]

We have reached out to Elexis at the request of Alea and are attempting to make arrangements to pick up the animals from her.

 

[Realauren89]

Yay a resolution.

 

[CwnAnnwn]

Maybe if people read what I have said, understood it before replying in wouldn't feel so attacked with constantly being told "you're just trying to justify keeping them" when I said several times I wasn't and that I don't want them. "Ship them now" who would you blame if they got held up and died? Me. "Wait to ship till warmer weather" ok I've said many many times that's what I wanted all along, yet people keep saying it like I never agreed to.

Ok, kid gloves come off.
We understand you don't want to keep the snakes. We know you only care for the well fare of the snakes. We get it.

Ms. Craig. We are not stupid. We are not against you. We are not arguing with you. We actually want to be on your side. Everyone here knows what it is like to have a friend stab us in the back. So stop treating us like we are stupid. It is just making you look bad and making us angry.

Ms. Craig. You are grieving. You know that right? You lost a friend, you feel hurt, taken advantaged of, and insulted.

Grief is a natural thing.


Denial: “This can’t be happening to me.”

Anger: “Why is this happening? Who is to blame?”

Bargaining: “Make this not happen, and in return I will ____.”

Depression: “I’m too sad to do anything.”

Acceptance: “I’m at peace with what happened.”

You are in the anger stage. Mixed in with a little bargaining and what you think is acceptance. We get that. We want to help. But you are too angry to listen. Take a break. If you feel the need to post. PM me. I will listen to everything you say and will not judge what you say. We all know what you are going through. You are just making this personal for some people that only care for your well being.

Some of the most level headed people and not so level headed people on this forum have given you advice. Please understand it was with the best intention. A lot of us have told you to take a break. I would take that to heart. You are not making yourself look good here. In fact, I worry about you.

 

[missred]

Ok, kid gloves come off.
We understand you don't want to keep the snakes. We know you only care for the well fare of the snakes. We get it.

Ms. Craig. We are not stupid. We are not against you. We are not arguing with you. We actually want to be on your side. Everyone here knows what it is like to have a friend stab us in the back. So stop treating us like we are stupid. It is just making you look bad and making us angry.

Ms. Craig. You are grieving. You know that right? You lost a friend, you feel hurt, taken advantaged of, and insulted.

Grief is a natural thing.


Denial: “This can’t be happening to me.”

Anger: “Why is this happening? Who is to blame?”

Bargaining: “Make this not happen, and in return I will ____.”

Depression: “I’m too sad to do anything.”

Acceptance: “I’m at peace with what happened.”

You are in the anger stage. Mixed in with a little bargaining and what you think is acceptance. We get that. We want to help. But you are too angry to listen. Take a break. If you feel the need to post. PM me. I will listen to everything you say and will not judge what you say. We all know what you are going through. You are just making this personal for some people that only care for your well being.

Some of the most level headed people and not so level headed people on this forum have given you advice. Please understand it was with the best intention. A lot of us have told you to take a break. I would take that to heart. You are not making yourself look good here. In fact, I worry about you.

I'll just state the only one who did stabbing was her..... I never took advantage of her in fact I'm the only person who OFFERED to pay the vet bills for the snake I GAVE her for payment despite it not really being my problem anymore!! I also paid for mite treats for a snake she got from a show that was covered in mites..... not to mention i paid for bedding for them as well because she NEVER asked for a single payment from me for ANYTHING till now..... so don't try saying I was the crap friend here..... as far as this goes this thread needs to end because it's settled as far as I'm concerned unless she feels she wants to civilly sue me then this is OVER!!!!

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[caffeinecynic]

I'll just state the only one who did stabbing was her..... I never took advantage of her in fact I'm the only person who OFFERED to pay the vet bills for the snake I GAVE her for payment despite it not really being my problem anymore!! I also paid for mite treats for a snake she got from a show that was covered in mites..... not to mention i paid for bedding for them as well because she NEVER asked for a single payment from me for ANYTHING till now..... so don't try saying I was the crap friend here..... as far as this goes this thread needs to end because it's settled as far as I'm concerned unless she feels she wants to civilly sue me then this is OVER!!!!

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I do not believe anyone is saying, specifically, that you stabbed her in the back, but more that Ms. Craig feels as though you have given the circumstances, and that that is a sentiment that others can sympathize with.

BOI threads don't go away just because you don't like the content of them or because you think it's 'done'.

I'm glad you found a rescue you feel comfortable sending your animals to, though, and I'm also glad you found a resolution to this. I hope that both of you can move on and learn from this experience.

 

[Kristi23]

It does seem like this should be coming to an end, but I have a couple points/questions. I'm sorry if this has been covered. I was trying to read as quickly as possible to catch up today.

Elexis, would you have asked her to pay for feeders had you two not gotten into a fight? It appears you mentioned that you had already planned to take care of them until spring and you had no agreement for payment. If that is the case, you seem vindictive asking for something now just because you got in an argument.

I do agree that the safety of the animals come first and shipping in winter is not the best option. However, it is not up to you to decide if Alea has proper housing or not. They are her snakes, period.

I see bad from both sides here, but Elexis' complaining and defensiveness is making her look even worse. Just my take on all this.

 

[tlmoon]

So it looks like Alea has come up with a solution, I give her credit for that. There has been a lot of drama on both sides, but Elexis - you turned a situation that looked favorable towards you at first and made yourself look terrible with all the arguing. Take a step back and think before posting. People have been giving you advice and feedback that you asked for, and you are taking it as an attack.

 

[AllisonLeigh]

When you make an agreement based on a friendship it doesn't then become a business relationship when the friendship goes away. I genuinely empathize with how frustrating it must be to feel like you went above and beyond for a friend and to feel like they don't appreciate it. It still doesn't change the agreement though.

Imagine it in a different scenario, not reptile related. Lets say you offer to baby sit a friend's kid while they go to the movies. If they then get in an argument with you via text while you are babysitting their kid you can't then charge an hourly rate, even if it is the normal going rate, just because it's not safe to leave the kid and you don't like them anymore. The agreement is made BEFORE you enter into it, that's why you have to be so careful doing open ended favors for friends. Even with friends there should be some form of contract or outline of what you both are agreeing to. If you didn't have a problem with her behavior prior to her telling you off over facebook drama then you can't use it as justification now.

I have to echo many of the previous comments though. People are reacting to how you are talking to them, just as you reacted to how Alea spoke to you. You're heated though, understandably upset, the people you are arguing with aren't as it doesn't affect them. You really need to step back and get some perspective on the situation as a whole. Everyone's responses are looking at this transaction as a business transaction. It's more to you and that is understandable but the BOI is a business related site so you have to understand that they're going to be a little more black and white/legal vs illegal on the situation.

I hope it all works out for both of you, there is enough stress and conflict in the world as it is so your hobbies certainly shouldn't add it to your life. Everyone needs a nice relaxing cup of tea and to realize that, despite the angry words, no animals were harmed in this BOI and that is something to be happy about.

 

[ElexisC]

I'll just state the only one who did stabbing was her..... I never took advantage of her in fact I'm the only person who OFFERED to pay the vet bills for the snake I GAVE her for payment despite it not really being my problem anymore!! I also paid for mite treats for a snake she got from a show that was covered in mites..... not to mention i paid for bedding for them as well because she NEVER asked for a single payment from me for ANYTHING till now..... so don't try saying I was the crap friend here..... as far as this goes this thread needs to end because it's settled as far as I'm concerned unless she feels she wants to civilly sue me then this is OVER!!!!

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And you didn't. You sent her and I noticed the nose issue. You said you'd help, and didn't. And I never brought that up or used it against you.

 

[ElexisC]

And photos for id? You know the only ones I have of those species are yours. Like id give up MY animals in place of yours? Or swap out yours for someone else's? Come on, you're acting like I'm a criminal. They're going to herps alive soon as we can get everything coordinated and transport supplies as I'm not giving up my own supplies I have for my own snakes unless it will be replaced. I will let everyone know when the hand off happens, until than, have a good day.

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[Reptar]

Ok lets put this to an end, maela has offered a solution to have some one in Ohio (Herps alive) take possession of the snakes. Elexis do you agree to give Herps alive the snakes?

 

[Reptar]

Ok lets put this to an end, maela has offered a solution to have some one in Ohio (Herps alive) take possession of the snakes. Elexis do you agree to give Herps alive the snakes?

Sorry did not see she has already agreed to return the snakes, good luck to both of you.

 

[meowmeowkazoo]

Elexis, if you just choose to stop being offended at literally everyone, this will be so much easier for you.

 

[Deborah Stewart]

And photos for id? You know the only ones I have of those species are yours. Like id give up MY animals in place of yours? Or swap out yours for someone else's? Come on, you're acting like I'm a criminal. T

Was this really necessary?

A mature individual would not keep arguing and make snarky remarks when a viable resolution is offered.

If this is the way you deal with your friends I can only imagine how you deal with other individuals

Food for the thoughts that could help your future relationships/dealings with people.

When asking for advice make sure you are willing and ready to take all them into considerations.

Conduct yourself like a mature adult, it's not always about who is right, get the lat word or get it's way it's sometimes about being the bigger person.

At least a resolution was offered hopefully now you can move on and learn from this situation and the way you handled it.

 

[Kristi23]

Was this really necessary?

A mature individual would not keep arguing and make snarky remarks when a viable resolution is offered.

If this is the way you deal with your friends I can only imagine how you deal with other individuals

Food for the thoughts that could help your future relationships/dealings with people.

When asking for advice make sure you are willing and ready to take all them into considerations.

Conduct yourself like a mature adult, it's not always about who is right, get the lat word or get it's way it's sometimes about being the bigger person.

At least a resolution was offered hopefully now you can move on and learn from this situation and the way you handled it.

This 100%.

I see the listing of snakes with pictures as a normal thing that anyone would do when rehoming. It's so they make sure they know what they are getting. It doesn't mean she was expecting you to switch things out or steal. You are reading way too much into this Elexis.

 

[ElexisC]

Was this really necessary?

A mature individual would not keep arguing and make snarky remarks when a viable resolution is offered.

If this is the way you deal with your friends I can only imagine how you deal with other individuals

Food for the thoughts that could help your future relationships/dealings with people.

When asking for advice make sure you are willing and ready to take all them into considerations.

Conduct yourself like a mature adult, it's not always about who is right, get the lat word or get it's way it's sometimes about being the bigger person.

At least a resolution was offered hopefully now you can move on and learn from this situation and the way you handled it.

She's no longer a friend. And you know nothing of what I'm truly like. You see some words on a screen and hear them how you want to. You want it to come off as combative and snarky so that's the way you read it.

I did her a huge favor and she slapped me in the face several times. I'm DONE. This is me fed up, not how I am normal. I could easily say screw it, screw her, screw everyone and just keep them but no I've made it clear that's not the type of person I am. No one cares she's lied, she took in animals instead of trying to get these back, oh and how she tried to throw in there how she "offered to cover vet costs for a snake that wasn't my problem anymore" yea she offered, but never made good. She knew she was going to need to see a vet but wasn't her problem anymore. Injured snake for payment as she says. Yea I just needed another expense on top of everything else.

But I guess none of that matters only me for wanting advice, being treated like I'm going to keep them and snarky remarks made at me but I'm supposed to just swallow those right? Funny how everyone wanted to give that thief Kruger the acceptance to charge a boarding fee when he never made good on his deal but God forbid I asked for some rat fees after being utterly disrespected, slapped in the face, lied about etc.

Again this is over. I will post when the hand off goes through.

 

[Kristi23]

You can't compare this to the Kruger situation. Completely different and I didn't agree with him charging anything with that either.

You agreed to keep them for free. I'm assuming you didn't tell her "I'll keep them for free until I get mad and change my mind". That was your agreement to keep.

You say you didn't want to keep the snakes, but again you mentioned how you could have. Yes, you could have, and everyone would have told you how wrong you were and you would have made that do not sell to buy from list that everyone has. You both did things that weren't perfect, but I only see one side still going on and on about it. Right now, you are the only one making yourself look bad.